Move toward what matters, even when life feels difficult
Trying to avoid anxiety, sadness, fear, or other painful emotions can provide temporary relief. Over time, however, organizing your life around avoiding discomfort may keep you from relationships, activities, and opportunities that matter to you.
Dr. Irwin Rosenfarb provides Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in San Diego and across California for adults who want to respond more flexibly to difficult thoughts and emotions. He trained with Dr. Steven C. Hayes, the developer of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and uses ACT within a compassionate and collaborative therapeutic relationship.
ACT does not require you to wait until every uncomfortable feeling disappears before moving forward. It can help you make room for difficult experiences, clarify what matters to you, and take meaningful action guided by your values.
What is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy?
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, commonly called ACT, is an evidence-based form of psychotherapy focused on psychological flexibility.
Psychological flexibility means being able to experience difficult thoughts and emotions while choosing actions that reflect your values and circumstances. The objective is not to eliminate normal sadness, anxiety, anger, disappointment, or uncertainty. Instead, ACT helps you develop a different relationship with these experiences so they do not determine every decision.
For example, you may avoid social situations because you fear embarrassment or postpone an important decision because you are anxious about making the wrong choice. Avoidance can reduce distress in the moment, but it may also make your life increasingly restricted.
ACT helps you notice this pattern and consider whether attempts to control discomfort are moving you toward or away from the life you want.
Core Skills in ACT
ACT is shaped around several connected skills. Treatment is adapted to the client rather than delivered through one rigid process.
Making Room for Difficult Emotions
It is understandable to want relief from painful feelings. Acceptance does not mean enjoying distress, approving of a harmful situation, or giving up on change. It means allowing an internal experience to be present without devoting all your energy to fighting or escaping it.
You might feel anxious before an important conversation, for example. Acceptance allows you to acknowledge the anxiety while deciding whether having the conversation reflects the kind of relationship you want to build.
Creating Distance From Thoughts
Thoughts can feel convincing without being facts or instructions. You may think, “I am going to fail,” “People will judge me,” or “I cannot handle this.” Trying to force these thoughts away may make them even more persistent.
ACT can help you notice a thought without automatically following it. Creating this distance, sometimes called cognitive defusion, gives you more room to decide how you want to respond.
Becoming More Present
Worry can pull your attention toward what might happen, while regret can keep you focused on the past. ACT may use mindfulness and present-moment awareness to help you notice what is happening now with greater openness.
Being present does not make a difficult experience disappear. It can help you respond to what is actually happening instead of reacting only to predictions, memories, or familiar mental stories.
Clarifying Your Values
Values describe the qualities and directions you want to bring to your life. You might value being a supportive partner, maintaining close relationships, learning, contributing to your community, or approaching challenges with courage.
Values are different from goals. A goal can be completed, while a value continues to guide how you act. ACT helps you clarify what matters and identify choices that bring your behavior closer to those values.
Taking Meaningful Action
Committed action means taking practical steps guided by your values, even when discomfort is present. These steps do not need to be dramatic.
You might reconnect with someone important, return to an activity you have avoided, explore a career opportunity, or begin a difficult conversation. Small, consistent actions can help you build a life that is not organized entirely around fear or emotional discomfort.
What Can ACT Help With?
Dr. Rosenfarb may use ACT to help clients experiencing:
- Anxiety, worry, and avoidance
- Depression and withdrawal
- Self-critical or repetitive thinking
- Difficulty tolerating uncertainty
- Stressful life transitions
- Relationship concerns
- Feeling disconnected from personal values
- Attempts to control thoughts or emotions that restrict daily life
Learn more about Dr. Rosenfarb’s approach to anxiety and depression and relationship counseling.
ACT and CBT: How Are They Different?
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy often helps clients examine thoughts and behaviors and develop more balanced responses. ACT places additional emphasis on changing your relationship with thoughts, making room for difficult emotions, clarifying values, and taking committed action.
The approaches overlap and do not need to compete. Dr. Rosenfarb may draw from CBT, ACT, or both depending on your needs, goals, and circumstances.
An Experienced ACT Therapist in San Diego
Dr. Rosenfarb is a licensed psychologist with more than 40 years of experience. He is also the former Director of the Clinical Psychology PhD program at Alliant University, San Diego, and is currently Professor Emeritus in the Clinical Psychology Ph.D. program at CSPP/Alliant University. He has served as principal investigator on an NIMH research grant and has authored more than 100 publications and presentations.
His work combines empirically supported psychotherapy with compassion, respect, and attention to the therapeutic relationship. Treatment is shaped around your concerns and values rather than a one-size-fits-all plan.
ACT Therapy in Scripps Ranch, Sorrento Valley, and across California
Dr. Rosenfarb provides ACT therapy at offices in Scripps Ranch and University City, serving adults from throughout San Diego and across California.
Contact Dr. Rosenfarb to schedule an introductory phone conversation and discuss whether Acceptance and Commitment Therapy may be appropriate for you.